Saturday, April 21, 2007

League = da Club

Well it's opening week for most softball leagues and all the players out there are pretty excited.

This year I'm playing in a new league on Saturday's and in a couple of my existing leagues new teams are joining to add spice to the same old.

This got my demented mind thinking about how a softball league and a night lub are very similar.

Top Ten Reasons Why a Softball League and a Night Club are very similar

10. Both are filled with players looking to hustle - Your game better be tight if you wanna win
9. Plenty of liquor and weed can be found in both
8. It's hard to find a good dependable person to hookup with in a nightclub, and in a softball league it's hard to find good dependable players to fill your roster
7. In the club if you want to get the pretty girl you have to ignore her and eventually she'll pay attention to you and that's when you buy her drinks and hook up, In softball leagues you don't sweat the stud softball players by asking them to play for you. You have to go through the proper channels and then buy them drinks to get them to play with you.
6. In most clubs anyone can get in as long as they wait on line and pay the cover charge, In most leagues it doesn't matter if you suck as long as you can pay your league and ump fees your in there.
5. Certain clubs are hot spots and are hard to get into if you don't know someone at the velvet rope. Some softball leagues are tough to get into because they have high standards and require new teams to go through an interview process - i.e. Big Apple and Inwood
4. Ugly fights break out in clubs between drunk goons who only know how to ruin everyone good team. The same thing happens in softball as there is always one team full of goons and morons that instigate fights with the opposition and/or umpires
3. In the club there is always one guy who is not really that old just too old for that club (I've been that guy), While in softball there is always one player or team that is not really that old just too old to play competitively anymore
2. Except for a couple of special nights most clubs are a waste of time and money. Most softball leagues have only a few good teams that you look forward to playing against and the rest are just a waste of time because they suck.

and the Number One Reasons Why a Softball League and a Night Club are very similar

1. Whatever happens in the nightclub does not stay at the night club because the next day you call up all your friends and brag about where you where last night and who you hooked up with. Same thing in the softball league, if you had a big game you call up all your friends and tell them your the man. Of course the opposite is also true, if you were a scrub at the nightclub or the softball game you tell no one and keep it to yourself and hope for better luck next time.

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