Friday, February 28, 2014

No Rhyme or Reason for Nuthin #5.. Hanging in There

  • I play ball

  • I also play the corporate ball with "The Man"

and in both popular phrases are used over and over again, day after day after day.

One of the more popular ones is "Hanging in There" which basically is a way of saying that you are all right, but could be better. Or is it?  Maybe not. 

Let's play a "Hanging in There"  doubleheader and compare Softball/Baseball versus "The Man's" Corporate world in two common scenarios:

Scenario #1 Dealing with Failure/Adversity - "Hanging in There" 

Softball/Baseball - You make an Error, bad at bat, base running blunder, braine freeze, and 
  • Your teammate/manager says "Hang in There" - means "get em next time" and don't get down. I believe in you or we have no one else, I have to say "Hang in There" and keep going.
  • Someone asks you if your OK and you say "Hanging in There" - means you know you fucked up and your dealing with it. Perseverance.

The Man/ Corporate World - You make an error and 
              (1) Your Nice Co-worker says "Hang in There" - means I like you and know you can do better. Learn from it.
              (2) Evil/Fake Co-worker says "Hang in There" - means I'm so happy you fucked up. I look so good now. I want your job and will throw you under the bus every chance I get.

Edge: Softball/Baseball - enemies and friends are easier seen on the diamond.

Scenario #2 Random Encounter - "Hanging in There" 

Softball/Baseball - Either at the field ,on the base paths, or on the way to the field you randomly run into someone (fan, player, ump, manager, commissioner) and they ask you how everything is going and you say "Hanging in there" which means either:
  • Doing my best.
  • Love the game can't wait to play. 
  • I sacrificed a lot to get here
  • Despite all the bullshit I have to deal with I love the game
  • You don't have anything else to say and somehow everyone relates to "Hanging in There" and it's the quickest way to end a conversation.
The Man/ Corporate World -  You pass a co-worker in the hallway and they ask "How is everything going and one of you say "Hanging in There" - means 
  • Fuck I hate my job  
  • I wish I was sleeping or on vacation.
  • Shut Up and leave me alone
  • I don't even want to acknowledge your presence, but I have to be politically correct and say something. Yeah I'm fake
  • I wanna go home. Is it 5pm?

Edge Softball/Baseball - It's just so much more positive in sports.

Softball/Baseball sweeps the "Hanging in There" comparison Doubleheader. Not a surprise as the game is much more sincere than business. 

As an fyi: I never say "Hanging in There" at work instead  I like to be different and say something like "Doing My Best", especially when I pass someone in the hallway. It just seems so more positive and less fake.

In business and softball, no one cares about yesterday or last year you have to bring your best everyday. Or at lest try to. But if something does go wrong remember to "Hang in There" in both.


Thursday, February 20, 2014

No Rhyme or Reason for Nuthin #6 - Games of Thrones

Over the last few months I've become a big fan of the HBO Series Game of Thrones as I've powered watch 3 seasons worth of episodes and can't wait for season #4 in April. I love the  
  • Wolves 

  • Dragons

  • Talented Actors and actresses that play unique and compelling Heroes

  • and Heroines

The main premise of the show is a Power Struggle as Noble houses are in a civil war for the
Iron Throne 

of the Seven Kingdoms;  

In their quest for power there is a lot of treachery, blood shed, scheming, pain, and suffering. A very steep price to pay to sit on the Iron Throne.

We all know that in the softball world the Game of Thrones quest for power exists, but really when you compare it to what's happening in the real world it seems fairly petty and silly.  

Ukraine is at the heart and center of the real world Game of Thrones these days as they are on the verge of civil war.Here's a quick Recap to this very disturbing too real Game of Thrones Power Struggle: 
  • Protestors, led by ex-heavy weight champ Vitali Klitschko, 
are seeking to overturn constitutional changes that strengthened President Yanukovych’s powers and to put the nation on a path toward European Union "EU" membership 
  • Thousands of protesters invaded and still remain in Independence Square in Kiev
  • It's been ugly as at least 26 people -- protesters and police alike -- were killed 
  • The president wasn’t seeing the situation rationally, and his only demand was that protesters leave the camp on the square known as Maidan. 
  • The government has called the protesters terrorist and imposed martial law. 
  • Protesters have repeatedly stated "There’s no way we leave, because we have nothing to lose anymore, “Today, we face the choice of whether we’ll be a colony of Russia or an independent state, We are not afraid.”
  • Protesters lobbed Molotov cocktails (fire) from behind their barricades while waving flags, singing the national anthem and stoking bonfires with anything that burns.
  • Russia blamed the U.S. and the European Union for the violence.  “Western politicians and European structures” and their“policy of connivance” are guilty for the escalation of the violence"
  • Finally today at midnight, Ukraine's president declared a truce in his tumultuous nation, as well as the start of negotiations aimed at not only preventing further bloodshed but forging a lasting peace.
 My thoughts - It's Ugly. 

But no way do "terrorist" sing the national anthem of their own country and stand out in the open and fight for what they believe. The following quote was very powerful "The government would like the world to believe that those on Maidan are just terrorists and extremists to justify the bloodshed,... that those on Maidan are armed with firearms and rioting," Kiev protester MaiaKiev told CNN  "But it's not a riot ... It's a revolution of dignity."

Violence against your own people is never the answer. Never.

Unfortunately, in this real world Game of Thrones, bloodshed was spilled and may continue to be spilled. A high cost. Too High.

As for the US getting blamed, Fuck you Russia, don't try and flip this on us.  U.S President Barack Obama stated "We hold the Ukrainian government primarily responsible," "for making sure that it is dealing with peaceful protesters in an appropriate way, that the Ukrainian people are able to assemble and speak freely about their interests without fear of repression."

He's Right .

We take living here for granted.Man, America has it's own Game of Thrones power struggles, but man am I sure glad I live here. Freedom.

Friday, February 14, 2014

No Rhyme or Reason for Nuthin #7 ... Too Much Pressure as "It's not you it's Me"

You ever been on the giving or receiving end of the classic relationship ending line?
 "It's Not You It's Me".

I've been on both sides of it and what it really means is :
"It's Not Me, It's Really All You"

It's a nice,soft,gentle, and polite way of telling someone your involved with that you want to fuck someone else and that your life would be so much better if they weren't around anymore. I know this break up line is something you would expect in a Seinfeld rerun

or some horrible predictable corny chick flick Romantic Comedy
 instead of a softball blog.  Normally, I would agree, but last week I was given a Softball version of the "It's Not You It's Me" breakup line by The Bum Rush League? 

Huh?????   If I was getting dumped by the Softball Version of Sophie Vergara

I would understand, but The Bum Rush League?

Hold on let me explain. I love this league b/c :
  • It's true modified
  • Its early on Sunday mornings
  • Competition is balanced and improved. 
  • Great Fields
  • Affordable 
  • Solid Officiating
  • I have many Friends, Enemies, and Frien-Enemy's in the league.Rivalries
  • I've played in it for 6 years and in that time I have made four championships, finished last, and won three titles. Very good times.
  • Most importantly, it is so much fun.
This league used to be looked at as inferior, but that has changed. Now it's looked at as fun and an alternative to the dysfunction in the afternoon..The only problem with this league now is that it's a classic No Country for Old Men production. They rarely adapt and never expand. Same six teams year after year. This league is ready for expansion b/c
  1. All the "love reasons" listed above. People want Fun and no Drama
  2. I secured the field 6 permit at Hecksher from 9am until 11am. Prime Central Park location
  3. Demand for True Modified Softball
This league has a lot going for it and could easily get two more teams to join. Hell I even did that for them by securing three ball clubs (one extra as a backup). I did all the work for them, got them the field and teams, and it looked like a can't miss deal. But, there is always a but, then the worst thing possible that could happen in softball decision making happened - it went to a Vote. 

I always have said voting doesn't work in softball (see the afternoon league) and the Bum Rush League proved me right.The Vote for new membership went down, and despite all the positives listed above, I was informed that the League in early of February 2014 that adding two new teams would be denied b/c "It Was Too Much Pressure". 

"Too Much Pressure"???? - Hilarious

I'm not mad, I really mean that I think this is Hilarious. Turning down 2 new teams with well over 2 months before opening day in an environment where you have the Fields and Demand, b/c there was not enough time and too much pressure. Hilarious.

Definitely, a Softball Version of  "It's Not You It's Me"

You don' have to an Evelyn Wood speed reader to read between the lines on this decisions. It's simple voting was based on what's best for individual teams in terms of improving their chances to win, limiting competition, and maintaining control rather than what was in the best interest of softball.

Oh well, I tried and was politely asked to reapply next year. I will b/c this "It's Not You It's Me Too Much Pressure excuse" won't be forgotten.

As an aside, the Insider would like to thank league commissioner Michael Leiman 

who was very patient, accommodating, and a pleasure to deal with throughout the whole process. A very nice guy who I've teased for years by calling him "Honey I shrunk the Kids" 

every time he got a hit against my team to torture me ( he did that a lot, too much). Mike has a true love of the game which is undeniable. Good man. Classy. Thank you

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

No Rhyme or Reason for Nuthin #8 ... A Modest Proposal

In response to yesterday's SB Mult-Tasking posting, I received the following Modest Proposal from one of my loyal readers:

"Who's got some dirt on what's going on this off season in the Big Apple for 2014? 
We need quality teams to replace "Marlins" and "Brother Jimmy's". 
Will Highlanders be allowed back in? 
Will the pitching remain the same? 
Will Working Class return? 
Will Rosenmiller quit smoking? "

This request hits at the very core of every Big Apple players 2014 concerns. Here is what I know about what's going on with the once shinny, but now slightly tarnished Big Apple League :

  • Correct Brother Jimmy has folded and merged with Empire. While not confirmed, one can only speculate that Rocker was included. That leaves 11 Teams.
  • Correct Marlins quit in the middle of last year. Doomed by talented young guys and no open pitching. That leaves 10 teams.
  • Highlanders - One and done. Don't want to deal with sling politics and just didn't seem to fit in. That leaves 10 teams. I think we have a trend here.
  • West. The once proud champion will most likely not return. A spin off is possible, but as of right now unlikely. That leaves 9 Teams. The Trend is down.
  • Revolution finished about 1-23 last year. They have disbanded. It's like new year eve as the countdown is now at 8.
  • Rangers - have been in the league well over 20 years and are looking very shaky to field a team now. The team is fractured. Several players have moved to either Iron Bound or Parts. Let's say the league has 7 for now.
  • Odds are League will have 8 teams, That's OK but still down 33%, not exactly a stock you would want to invest in.
  • Less Teams will mean that the top high impact guys available form the pool above will most likely sign with top teams like the Parts and Radio (by the way they will have a new name again this year as word on the SB street is that Trenk is taking over). More importantly, the league become top heavy again.
  • Average players will be nothing more than forfeit avoiders drifting around like nomads. Just a bunch of SB versions of Lyle Overbays hoping to hang on by signing a minor league deal and on days someone is short get some burn b/c they don't wanna go home and change diapers and watch Dora the Explorer
    all Sunday afternoon.
  • Reduced teams could lead to permits being surrender b/c of costs and lack of usage. Not good, not good at all.
  • Their has been talk of allowing one "A" pitcher to throw one game a week and two games come playoff time. Translation Live by the Sling Die by the Sling. This is like getting diagnosed with a broken leg and your doctor performing Root canal. I don't want to think about the endless moronic conversation that this rule will cause.
  • Rumors are Working class will return. New name maybe. Whatever.
  • Yes Rosenmiller will continue smoking, but have someone keep an eye out for parking Rangers giving tickets.
Unfortunately, these facts are not the solution for the problems facing probably one of the highest profile leagues in NYC. Reduced membership should not be symptoms of a flourishing league, there should be demand. Many people say that the elite pitching in the league is the reason that the league is so competitive as it attracts premier players. If so, then why is membership diminishing? 

Clearly, there is a problem.Well I think a finally have solution for the once proud beleaguered flagship softball league of NYC. You see this whole situation reminds me of when I was a freshman in college and read "A Modest Proposal", which was was mandatory reading. In his essay, the author Johnathan Swift, states that the poor Irish might ease their economic troubles by selling their children as food for rich gentlemen and ladies. I was reading this long boring shit (like your reading my boring long paragraph right now) when all of a sudden Swift wrote ""A young healthy child well nursed, is, at a year old, a most delicious nourishing and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee, or a ragout." 

I was like what the fuck??? I actually thought this crazy motherfucker meant it and that the he would go to jail in the end. I didn't know any better as I was just an A96 kid in college. My teacher laughed at me (and others in who felt the same in the class) and explained to me that Swift was using shock value to emphasize the plight of starving beggars in Ireland and mocks the heartless attitudes towards the poor.   

I was though to myself "Cool - Very intelligent.Sarcastic. I like it."

Furthermore, to get his real point across Swift used a mechanism called Parasiopesis (Wikipedia is so cool) where he brings up a subject by either denying it, or denying that it should be brought up. For example: Swift introduces reforms by saying "Therefore let no man talk to me of other expedients:
  • Of taxing our absentees at five shillings a pound:
  • Of curing the expensiveness of pride, vanity, idleness, and gaming in our women: 
  • Of introducing a vein of parsimony, prudence and temperance:
  • Of learning to love our country, 
Sarcasm, Again very cool.

So taking a page from Mr. Swift I would like to invoke Parasiopesis and:

  • Not talk about banning pitchers
  • Not talk about that if these pitchers were banned that NO ONE WILL QUIT. NO ONE.
  • Not talk about the fact that if these pitchers are banned, more modified teams will join.
  • Not talk about the fact that bringing a team to this league without sling is a complete utter waste of time. You lose money, get no extra playing time, and only headaches.
  • Not talk about the fact that open pitchers belong in 9 man ball with bunting & stealing.
  • Not talk about what is or isn't modified b/c clearing the powers that be do not know
  • Not talk about terrible committees who are motivated by self interest rather than what is in the best interest of the league. Leadership is lacking.
  • Not talk about losing good loyal teams b/c they don't have sling pitching
What I would like to do is offer one Johnathan Swift like solution, no I am not suggesting selling/eating children rather I would like to suggest selling pitchers. It's really quite simple, top pitchers want to get paid, so why don't we do just that. 

My modest proposal is as follows:
  • All "A pitchers" must register with a league for a initial membership fee. Say $200
  • As part of every team's league fee, a $100-150 per week fee will be added to actually pay a pitcher. So let's say you play 20 weeks, that means your league fee would be normal league costs plus $2,000-3,000. Let's Keep it real. It's happening anyway, let's just let everyone get a pitcher by opening paying them in a salary cap atmosphere
  • Pitchers will be paid cash every week. If teams wanna pay them more that's on them
  • Pitchers will be allowed to stay with a team for only 3 years. They can traded.
  • A draft will be held in reverse order of standings
This makes everyone is happy. 
  1. Pitchers get paid. 
  2. All teams are on a level playing ground
  3. No one argues about sling.
  4. The league make some extra cash for pimping all these "pitchers de wawa" (won't translate as it loses something when I convert from Spanglish)
  5. Competition will remain high b/c all the top pitchers will remain in the league
I say pimp and pay the pitchers, Just a SB Modest Proposal. Think about it

Monday, February 10, 2014

No Rhyme or Reason for Nuthin #9 ... Mike Trout Inspired

No Rhyme or Reason for Nuthin #9 ... Mike Trout Inspired

Too long of a lag between blogs, sucks, lot's of people out there saying I'm done and that it looks bleak for good softball.

Fuck That. 

You see I was counting on you to count me out, and like I said before "Softball ain't dying on my watch". I'm going back to what got me here:
  • cocky
  • honest
  • weird
  • real
  • rude
and most important standing for something, and that something is good softball.

The weather may be miserable, 

and league choices in 2014 are limited by:
  • convenience
  • commitments
  • competition
  • politics
  • assholes
  • and cost.
Whew that's a pretty intimidating, but through all that bullshit the love is stronger than ever.

So how does an avid softball player/blogger deal with the 2014 season:

Simple: Take advice from one of the most inspirational Real World Heroes I have ever met:
President Barack Obama:

When talking about a bill trying to help people (wow a President that tries to help people man he sucks) Barack said

"the farm bill is not just about helping farmers. It's a jobs bill, an innovation bill, an infrastructure bill, a research bill, a conservation bill. It’s like a Swiss army knife. It’s like Mike Trout, for those of you who know baseball.”It's somebody who's got a lot of tools and multitasks."

Very cool sports reference for a real life event. The insider can relate.

I'm not Mike Trout (duh)by any means, 

but I can multi-task



  •  Blogger
  • Psycho-Maniac
  • Weirdo
  • Fievrue
  • Commissioner
  • Manager
  • Treasurer
  • Softball Meat Head 
  • Goon
  • Consulatant
  • Trainer
  • Friend
  • Warrior
and more, so much more.

I will enjoy 2014 - you can count on that thanks to SB Multi-Tasking.

Softball ain't dying on my watch.