Monday, June 23, 2008

Breaking Up

Top Ten Elements that Breaking up with a significant other and
a Softball team folding have in common

10. Money - A lot of relationships tank over financial $$$ reasons.
No money for the mortgage, no job, can't pay juniors private school.
Same thing in softball.
When the guy paying the bills doesn't pay anymore teams fold like a bad hand in poker.
9. Geography -
If it's too inconvenient to get to games. Traffic, gas, parking - guys stop showing up.
Same thing in love.
In Spanish the saying "Amor de lejo es amor de pendejo" - means long distance love is for suckers and no good.
Please note that my wife and I maintained a long distance relationship for 2 1/2 years and made it work.
So if you really love playing in a league, then keep traveling and paying tolls :)))
8. "Take a Break"
Ah those classic words in a relationship that mean you want to fuck someone else.
In both love and softball you literally want to play the field b/c the grass is always greener on the other side.
7. Liquor - after both breaks ups you go on a drinking binge to forget and heal.
6. Hard to Do.
Breaking up with someone you like as a person sucks.
It's one of the hardest things b/c you know you look bad and don't want to hurt them.
Same thing in softball, it's tough leaving longtime friends/teammates b/c you want to play more elsewhere or win.
5. Do both over the phone - I know it's shiesty and cowardly but in both you avoid the awkward face to face tension, tears, and disappointment.
4 Booty Call - After breaking up with your partner you hook up with whatever has a pulse to get them out of your system.
In softball, you move on to the next game as quickly as possible.
3. 1st Time seeing them after Break up.
The 1st time you see an ex after dumping them or getting dumped by them is "weird".
You feel anger, jealousy, betrayal, rejection, and want vengeance.
The same emotions runs though you when you play against a former team - you want to beat them, make them miss you by busting their ass.
2. Arguing over worldly possessions.
When you break up you argue over who owns what - the car, the house, the kids.
In softball the same thing happens - the bases, the bats, the gloves, the permits.

and the #1 Element that Breaking up with a
significant other and a Softball team folding have in common

1. Denial
You hang on way to long in both, when it's obvious it's over.
You keeping calling, email, text messaging, stalking the other b/c if "no one knows them like you know them"
Same thing in softball, you keep calling players, driving around picking up guys to play, reschedule games, but deep down you know it's over. Time to Fold

1 comment:

  1. Dude, Did your game get rain out and this is all you can come up ?
    Tu ta Paso.......
    Oj

    ReplyDelete