Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Speech Making Managers

What would a softball game be without the pre-game, in-game, and post game speech by the SB manager/coach. So without much further ado
Top Ten SB Manager/Coach Speech Makers

10. Pete Martinez - Merrill Lynch.
Like James Brown Pete is the godfather of Softball

Pete's mad old skool, he doesn't fuck around and gives you mad tough love
Pre-game Speech: "Fellas these guys your playing suck, but if you don't put it on these boys right away before you know it it will be the 4th inning and the score will only be 3-2 us, then in the 7th it will be 4-3 them and then YOU'LL SUCK. Now let's go out there and take care of business"
In-Game Speech : "You motherfuckers are looking professional"
Post-Game Speech : "Good job coming out tonight and next week, uh excuse me Ricky why the Fuck are you talking when I'm talking. Shut up and Listen before I send you home"

9. Ben Manelli Pipefitters
Pre-Game Speech
: "Hi"
In-Game Speech: "Ok I'm cool with that"
Post-Game Speech "Thanks for coming"

8. Dio Jackson- WestLanders
The pre-game speech is not enough for Dio, he sends out about 1,000 text messages during the week about everything from the ridiculous to the sublime.

Pre-game Speech: "Focus. Stick Together. Trust me I have a plan. These guys are men just like us. Who cares what anyone says. Play the game. I love you guys". Honestly, I could go on and on, but think Denzel Washington in "Remember the Titans" In-game Speech : "Stay with Me" - in other words your out of the game, as you can see him telling me below

Post Game Speech: "I love you guys but we need to play Westlanders softball. Stick with me. I have a plan. Now let's go hang out and drink beers"

8. Blonde - Knockout KA Fidel Castro below

Pre-Game Speech : "Rick read the lineup"

In-Game Speech : " "

Post-Game Speech : " "

7. John Sheppard - Championship Manager

Pre-Game Speech: "Ricky read the lineup" - common wise choice as experienced guy has loudest mouth read the lineup

In-Game Speech: 3 Classics

"Not for nothing, but guys leave the umpires to me".

"Ricky shut up and do as I say"

"I don't care what anyone says about your Ricky I love you"

Post Game Speech:"Where's Smokey?"

6. Mike Mena - Bombers

Pre-Game Speech: "Guys I made the lineup last night and here it is

In-Game Speech: not applicable - Mike is very laid back and easy going

Post Game Speech:"Pay your league fee guys"

5. Lou "22" Gonzalez - one of the greatest softball competitors and players around. Lou never manages, but is always in charge. Lou gets your ready for softball war. After he speaks I'm ready to storm the beach at Normandy!

Pre-Game Speech: "We're here to win. Don't sleep on these guys they can do xyz and beat us. Just cause you won 1 championship that's nothing your a one hit wonder like Minny Vanilli, you got to build a reputation of continued excellence. We came to win"

In-Game Speech: "You've seen this pitcher already make the adjustment"

Post Game Speech:"Great Job guys. You beat a seasoned quality opponent and every single one of you did something to help us win"

4. Charlie and Brian - Westies
Pre-Game Speech : "Nice to see you"
In-Game Speech : "Sit this inning and then go to Cf next inning"
Post-Game Speech :"Nice to see you again see you next week"

2. John RosenMiller - Choice Parts
Pre-Game Speech : "Where are my cigarettes?"
In-Game Speech : "Good call Mr. Johnson" & "Where are my cigarettes?"
Post-Game Speech: "Where are my cigarettes?"

and the Number One SB Manager/Coach Speech Makers

1. Bob Morello - Charter Fabric
Pre-Game Speech :
"Guys take a strike and don't throw the ball around"
In-Game Speech : "Guys take a strike and don't throw the ball around"
Post-Game Speech : "Guys take a strike and don't throw the ball around"


  1. What about the Ric managerial speech?

    1. read the line up "fellas, this is how were' going to go..."

    2. huddle and cheer "1-2-3 Win"

    3. Ric spends the rest of the game figuring out how to keep himself in the lineup.

  2. You must hear Ruddy from the bombers,thats a classic.

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