Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Most Obnoxious/Selfish SB ?????

OK picture this perfect softball scene.The weather is perfect
Your entire team has showed upYour playing a quality opponentYour playing on a beautiful field Your All Pumped up ready to Play
It's all Systems Go and Your ready
When your meticulous manager huddles everyone up to read the lineup Then it happens.
Just before you take the field or come up to bat you hear the Most Obnoxious & Selfish Softball Question imaginable from someone, anyone, it could even be you that says:
"Why am I batting so low in the lineup"?
Let the selfish unnecessary useless unwanted stress begin as some asshole is determined to ruin your softball experience.

So in classic SBI fashion let's Top Ten the responses to the Most Obnoxious/Selfish Softball Question "Why am I batting so low in the lineup"?

10. You Suck - Accept it asshole. Just be happy your in the lineup and stay humble.

9. You Don't Suck - but just shut up.

8. Everyone Else is Better than You - Your on a stacked team.
Is it better to rule in hell and bat 3rd for a bad team or bat lower on a championship ball club. Deal with it or go play on a non contending team

7. Your New to an Established team - Pacienca y Fe - everything will work out

6. Your an Egomaniac - I've seen millionaires and crack heads asks this annoying question during a game. It's all about you feeding your ego. Grow Up Bitch

5. Maybe the Manger is an idiot - OK it happens. Why don't you talk to him in private or on the side after the game. No need to air your dirty laundry in public.

4. That's the Way It Is - on some teams player X will always lead off or Player Y will always bat 3rd. It's been that way for years and it will be that way forever. That's just the way it is so smarten up, shut up, and play.

3. It Doesn't Matter where you Bat it's How you Hit - The game has a funny way of coming to do, if you focus on how your hitting instead of where your batting, you have a better chance to succeed. Small minds worry about their place in the order.

2. Breaking News : Trying Getting a Hit or showing up regularly - maybe that will help stupid

and the Number One Proper responses to the questions "Why am I batting so low in the lineup"?

1. No One Besides you Fucking cares - Unless you play with guys who know you and have an established reputation as an impact player you have no business complaining about your spot in the lineup especially during a game. You might be justified but handle it afterwards otherwise you look like a selfish idiot.


  1. Couldn't have said it better myself.

  2. This is a good one Rick!!! Hysterical.

    -Jeff Carroll

  3. Long live THE MISFITS !