Wednesday, July 16, 2008


A big story in the news this week was how lovely Miss. USA Crystle Stewart unfortunately fell during the Miss universe pageant.

This begs me to ask the metro sexual question :

What if NYC Softball had it's own Beauty Pageant who would win?
Top Ten NYC Softball Beauty Contestants
10. Dio Jackson - takes great pride in his hair.
But looks too much like Ozzie Guillen to ever win.

9. Andy Ayala - Good lefty hitter with the super model look.

The hair.
The uniform.
The batting gloves.

The lyrics form the song I'm too Sexy applies
"I'm a model you know what I mean And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah I shake my little touche on the catwalk"

8/7. Juan and Jorge Gonzalez - Twin Bothers who founded and manage the
Tiano Softball team in Chelsea.
Heck these guys even run the league -
Even though they are twins they both have their own unique sense of fashion and style.
Wearing anything less than a custom MLB quality jersey is not an option.

6. Juan Parra - Central Park Softball.
Very Good player
Very useful Utility Man.
Can hit for average , hit or power, pitch, play almost all the positions.
When his head is right Juan can help any team.
Juan is a Softball Diva.
Very Temperamental.
Also, listens to his IPOD while he plays to relax.
Very Divaish

5. Alex Goldman - Diesel - Son of Central Park legend Joel Goldman.
Alex is an emerging 5 tool player with tremendous upside who is also a great kid.
Alex looks like Nicholas Cage in Con Air

4. John Camacho- Sox Central Park Softball
Another guy who listens to his IPOD while playing softball. "se prive"
John loves to walk around with his shirt off all the time, when in reality he should keep his shirt on. With his shirt off and hanging against the dugout fence he reminds me of a captive Charlton Heston from the original Planet of the Apes.

3. Me.
The shoes. What is he thinking?
The dirty/stained/baggy clothes.
The cut-off shirt sleeves - so 80's.
Also when asked some intelligent question by the judges I would give a politically incorrect answer.
Think more along the lines of a degenerate and less talented Pete Rose

Ugly but effective.
2. Chelo - Inwood's legendary ground Keeper.
Seen below holding the Inwood Championship belt.
The missing teeth.
The drinking on the job.
The only reason Chelo could never be #1 is b/c when asked a question by the judges no one could understand his dialect of Spanish/English or whatever else he says
and the #1 NYC Softball Beauty Contestants

1. Jimmy Bitros - Manger Diesel. Central Park Legend
Think distinguished, smooth, charming.
A true Gentleman that knows how to talk to the ladies.
Someone like Frank Sinatra

No comments:

Post a Comment