SEVEN SIGNS OF THE APOCALYPSEI believe that the Softball Gods Exist
and recently their Seven Signs behavior has been foretelling of a Softball Apocalypse
The SB Gods are angry and softball, as we know it, is ending:
The Seven Signs of the Softball Apocalypse are:
7. Weather " The sky will turn dark and oceans will turn to blood;"
It's freaking freezing Austin Powers!!! How the fuck can you explain that the weather in January and February is better than April?
The Softball Gods - They are unhappy with the way we act. Punishment
6/5. Greed & Chicken Heads
"Chickenhead" is a derogatory lang term that can refer either to a "dumb female"
- Players want money.
- Players want a free ride ... AKA Scholarship
- Players want Perks
Basically, players are greedy chicken heads.
- Managers want Players.
- Managers want other teams players.
- Managers wan to win at all $$$ costs $$$
Basically, managers are greedy chicken heads
- Commissioners want more teams and money.
Basically, Commissioners are greedy chicken heads. Except Jeff Marcus.
The Softball Gods don't like greed. Greed ruins everything.
Fuck Greed : Remember "Pigs gets fed. Hogs get slaughtered"
4. Injuries right before the season - WTF?
So many people getting hurt - Me included
Last year my toe. This year Eye!!! damn
Why Softball Gods?
Why have you forsaken me?
Mercy Mercy Mercy
Guess "Stealing players" didn't settle well with them and the enacted revenge.
P.S. I stole no one. So Stop....
Too Many whiners in softball.
Man up and shut up.
That means stop complaining, play ball, and start helping.
Softball Gods hate whiners.
2. Mass Emails and Group texting
OMG - everyone in softball just loves to text everyone in a group or "Reply to All" in a an email.
Over and Over and Over
Softball Blood will flow on the diamond over this,It's Like Locust swarming everywhere in a plague.
Softball Gods Hate this.
They Despise this.
They will punish you somehow someway for this.
A simple In or Out reply to only the manager is sufficient.
The SB gods are torturing me with this.
1. Dwindling League Membership - No New Blood = Famines
Softball is dying. The Old School of players who live and die with softball are getting well...older.
Young guys have problems keeping a team together and many of them grew up on video games, Michael Jordan, and doing something else. Throw in greed and league membership is down everywhere as people are chasing small money
"And the antichrist will emerge to fight the final battle between good and evil. "...
I guess that's me... if my eye ever heals.