"Call me Ishmael"

The Classic Novel Moby Dick begins with one of the most recognizable opening lines "Call Me Ishmael" which tells the adventures of the wandering sailor Ishmael, and his voyage on the whale ship Pequod, commanded by Captain Ahab. Ishmael soon learns that Ahab seeks one specific ferocious whale, Moby Dick. In a previous encounter, the whale destroyed Ahab's boat and bit off his leg. Ahab intends to take Revenge. When he joined the ship, Ishmael didn't know that Ahab was a psycho maniac. Ultimately Ahab's obsession with Revenge would doom himself and the crew of the Pequod (save for Ishmael) to death.

My favorite revenge line in the book is during the final chase where Ahab hurls his final harpoon and yells "to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee. He piled upon the whale's white hump the sum of all the general rage and hate felt by his whole race from Adam down; and then, as if his chest had been a mortar, he burst his hot heart's shell upon it."

OK now that we took a walk down 10th grade English class, a good question to ask is : Why am I bringing up "Moby Dick" in softball? Well, in sports REVENGE is a common/classic theme. You want to stick it to an old team, opponent, manager, friend, etc b/c they have done something to you in the past that hurt you. Whether it be losing, getting released, benched, or disrespected you have been wronged and now it's payback time and nothing is sweeter than making a great play, hitting up a storm,or throwing a gem against them and hurting them where it truly hurts the most-on the field!

Well this year I was softball version of Ishmael as I was recruited to play on Bravery in the Broadway show league by Dave "L.D." Bergman. unknown to me, like Ahab, L.D. was on a win at all costs revenge mission against his former team and defending champion RJKHe wanted to beat them bad. Real Bad. But our team started out terribly with an 0-4 and 2-6 record, I honestly thought we wouldn't win a game at one point. But our manager Jack "Bandanna Man" Cutler kept hustling and our top players like Anthony

started showing up and we won 8 in a row and made it all the way to the finals only to lose a heart breaking 4-3 single elimination game in the bottom of the 7th to RJKCongrats RJK well deserved

It should be noted L.D. made a legitimate brilliant diving catch in LCF to keep us in the game and set up 7th inning dramatics via Ralph Serrano clutch two out RBI hit. But it was all for not, as we lost on a walk-off dribbler. Tough loss.

L.D. may have not gotten his revenge, but he got something more - our team's respect for playing his heart out all year. Funny I've played on 4 championship teams this year, but I am so much more proud of this team than all those others combined b/c of the adversity we overcame. It was an honor serving aboard the Pequod with captain Ahab, I uh mean playing on Bravery with L.D. - we have nothing to be ashamed of. Also, remember revenge is a dish best served cold, Dave you will get another chance

Big Apple Playoff Interview #2 Celebrity Analyst

First Charles Bailey broke down the Big apple Playoffs http://softballinsider.blogspot.com/2010/09/big-apple-final-four-analyzed-by-champ.html and now its his Working Class teammate Anthony Gonzalez turn. Anthony has a unique/different perspective on the Playoffs as he has earned multiple titles on Contact in the past. People underestimate his knowledge of the game b/c tourist often confuse him Richard Gere in Central Park

The resemblance is uncanny. Enjoy the interview :

P.S Your were great in Internal Affairs

"Miss Thing There is No Guest List Tonight"

The Inwood Softball Club http://citysoftball.wordpress.com/ will open for business this Sunday and our Velvet Ropehas an exclusive 14 team list that Ricky "Furio"has approved. So if you were lucky enough to contact Furio on your cell phone

and met our SB qualification then your all set to gain assess/entrance to our action packed spot. Otherwise I'm sorry but as Lil' Louis sang in 90s hit 'Club Lonely' "Miss Thing There is No Guest List Tonight"

Our SB spot

may not have the eye candy

of real world nightclubs, but there is still plenty of action

and entertainment to go around. If you are not on the list perhaps you can still make the best of your softball experience and go to one of our commercial ripoff competitors http://softballinsider.blogspot.com/2010/08/consumer-alert-reverse-psychology.html But I guarantee you it won't be the same, not even close. So I suggest your try and bribe a SB bouncer and try and get into our spot in the backdoor.

#1 KEY TO SB MONOPOLY

In the real world a monopoly

exists when a specific individual/enterprise has sufficient control over a particular product/service to determine significantly the terms on which other individuals shall have access to it. Monopolies (like the phone company or utilities) are thus characterised by a lack of economic competition for the goods/services that they provide and a lack of viable substitute goods. In other words, they are the only ones that have something you desperately need and charge you "up the wazoo" for it b/c quite frankly ....they can.

The #1 key to creating a softball monopoly is obtaining an ugly inexpensive yet precious paper called a PERMIT

Once you have this little legal document it's PERMIT MONOPOLY POWER

ACTIVATE TIME!!!!!!

As you can create a league to play on a field on specific dates/times and can tell everyone else to go workout elsewhere

if they don't want to pay your league fee and play by your rules. Furthermore, permits are "grandfather'd in" every year meaning if you held it last year and didn't cause any problems you automatically get renewed the following year. This leads to True Permit Monopoly Power!!!! That's why rip-off softball leagues like Yorkoff can charge ridiculous prices b/c they hold every single fall weeknight Manhattan permit and make you pay through the nose to play in their shitty league.

For the record, Inwood deeply values its permit and will NEVER!!!!!!! I REPEAT NEVER let it fall into the hands of unscrupulous softball leagues listed in my classic http://softballinsider.blogspot.com/2010/08/consumer-alert-reverse-psychology.html blog.Fight the Power!!!!!!!!!

BIG APPLE FINAL FOUR Analyzed by the Champ

The Big Apple Final Four will take place on Sunday September 12th. Seeing as I will be involved in the match ups I cannot comment on the games so I decided to go out and get a special playoff analyst Charlie "The (self proclaimed) Champ" Bailey who practically lives, breathes, and eats Central Park Softball. Enjoy his breakdown of the series below