RECRUITING WAR COMMANDMENTS

The season is fast approaching. Often times you will hear people referring to a hard fought game as a war.
Right now their is a different war being waged.The Recruiting War.
It's a vicious dirty game.Pitchers, stud hitters, forfeit avoiders, and sponsors are all being wooed by softball horny and hungry teams. Like Biggie Small said in his classic song "Ten Crack Commandments"
"I've been in this game for years it's made me an animal, there's rule to this shit I wrote me a manual"


Top Ten Recruiting War Rules
10. Promises - Never promise something you can't keep
All politician make promises and so do softball GM's and managers.
You promise playing time, a chance to win, and of course other "perks".
Make sure you keep your promises, or you lose softball credibility.
9. Discretion
Never let your opponents know your next move.
You can't trust other mangers/teams with any information.
They want to win just as bad as you.
8. Allies
Odds are your teammates know a lot of good players.
Don't be ashamed to ask for their help.
Not only will this help you recruit good players, but it gets everyone
excited about the season and shows your still loyal to them
Just remember to have everyone follow Rule #9.
7. Code of Ethics
Ethics?
Forget it
The biggest bullshit I hear is "I don't steal other teams players".
Yeah Right.
We know that right after the new year, the phone lines start to burn.
Now don't get me wrong, every team has guys that are off limits and that you shouldn't even bother talking to b/c they will never leave, but anything else is fair game.


6. Lego  A player is like a piece of Lego.





















If they fit you can build cool shit.Before you recruit a player know all you can about the player.
His skills, strengths, weakness, personality, temperament, heart, work schedule, family life and of course his level of commitment. Does he fit your needs? Will his teammates accept him? If he fits, your set.
But if he doesn't fit the mix, then as Biggie Small would say you'll "Find yourself in serious shit"

5. Ego
Power vs Power Tripping.
Are you really in charge?
Are you Fidel? 

Or are you a puppet with someone pulling the strings and using you?














It all depends if you financed the team.
But in any case, your the GM.
Don't make power tripping decisions.
Just make smart ones.
4. Geography
This rule is so underrated
Location. Location Location.
Is not only important in pitching and real estate, it's also key in recruiting.
Does a player live close to the field?
If getting to the field harder than the game, if YES, then odds he will quit and can't help you.
3. Let them Breathe
Ball players are like pretty girls, let them know you want them but don't stress them about it. Preserve, but don't be psycho about it.
Respect yourself
2. What doesn't Kill you makes you Deeper
There is no such thing as Over recruiting and having Too Many guys. A common mistake I hear people make is "we have too many guys don't recruit anyone else b/c it will hurt my or someone Else's playing time" OK. This is possible, but reality tells me this is selfish and short sighted.It's a long season out there and I even seen great teams struggle to field 9 guys on 100 degree days in July. Most of time having too many guys will work itself out via performance, injuries, or players quiting.It's about competition!!!!!!!

and Rule Number Uno

1. Know your Goal
Winning is the ultimate goal.
As ex-Jet coach Herman Edwards famously told a stupid reporter "You Play to win the game"
This one seems very obvious, but it really isn't. Dogs Chasing Cars without a plan/goal don't win.
Recruiting is all on paper. You win nothing but the chance to get better. All your trying to do is target players that address your weaknesses. Are you getting faster, younger, more experienced, more diversified, hitters/players and pitchers to the park. If so you've done your job.

Follow these rules you'll have a chance.Otherwise you'll be on your cell phone 1 minute before game time trying to avoid a mercy and forfeit.

Time To Report

Pitchers and Catchers - the only words that make the worst sports month, February, bearable.

For the average guy its still get up, walk the dog, take junior to school, go to work (if you even have a job in this economy .. GO STIMULUS!!!!!!), and go back home and pay the bills.

The weather sucks and there is no after work softball, but when you hear the words "Pitchers and Catchers" you know its time for pros, like AFraud,



















to report to camp and softball isn't that fair away.


Softball Players don't have "Spring Training" so how do most players get ready for the season?

Top Ten Ways Softball Players Get Ready for a Season

10. Forget getting in shape, they look for a Sponsor. There own version of an economic bailout. It's simple.
No Money = No team. All teams need a sugar daddy.
9. Batting Cages - read the classic blog
http://softballinsider.blogspot.com/2007/04/batting-cages-and-strip-clubs.html
tells you all you need to know about what Batting Cages do for you

8. Look for a practice field.
If your in Manhattan this is a major problem as the Dewitt Clinton 54th street Field, formerly called "Donde Caja la vaca" is closed for construction.
Los Locos haven't slept for weeks b/c they have no where to play until Central Park opens in early April.

7. Diet. Nah this is personal.
I just wanted to write that I've lost 6 pounds on my diet.
I weigh 222 lbs, still fat, but slowly getting there.
As Mr T said "PAIN"
6. Steroids - time to cycle on. There is no drug testing in softball.
5. Talk shit and tell everyone how good they are.
4. Look for a new team to play on.
3. Exercise. Lift weights, run, and masturbate to porn.
Anything to kill the boredom that is called February.
2. Prepare for their Fantasy Baseball draft.
Gotta get your statistical baseball swerve on. It makes you want to play, until you realize how much running is involved.

and the Number One Way Softball Players Get Ready for a Season

1. Play weekend exhibition softball games.
The weekend warrior wakes up after a long winter of hibernation, watching NFL games, eating chicken wings, and drinking beer to play meaningless softball in freezing weather on a Sat/Sunday morning.

ABRAHAM SHEPPARD

Two Great Americans were born on February 12th

Abraham Lincoln

and John Sheppard (on the left hand side of the picture below)

A coincidence?

I think not

Seeing that they share the same birthday, to celebrate the 200th Anniversary of the birth of arguably our greatest president and the 12345678.... ugh .. lets not give away John's age, let's compare Honest Abe to Honest Sheppard

Top Ten Comparisons Between Abraham Lincoln and John Sheppard

10. Lincoln was the first president to be assassinated.

John Sheppard was almost wacked several teams in softball for driving league officials, umpires, opponents, and teammates crazy.

Edge : John Sheppard - he's still alive

9. Lincoln was an animal lover.
John Sheppard is an animal lover as he walks his dog Mollie everyday.

Edge : Tie

8. Lincoln was the tallest U.S. president.
John has been called many things, but tall is not one of them.

Edge: Honest Abe

7. John Wilkes Booth's brother saved the life of Lincoln's son.
Crazy the brother of the guy who wacked Lincoln saved Lincoln's son.
Weird.

In softball, John's one time nemesis, Dio Jackson (to the right above), is now his softball ally. Weird.

Edge : John Sheppard - he's still alive

6. Lincoln was an avid reader and largely self-educated.

John Sheppard keeps one of the most meticulous score books in softball.

Edge : Close, but I will go with john Sheppard b/c I have bad handwriting and admire neat penmanship.

5. Dealing with Difficult Issues

Lincoln first encountered slavery as a boat hand on the Mississippi

In 1831, Abraham Lincoln and two others were hired to take a flatboat full of cargo down the Mississippi River to New Orleans, La. Denton Offutt, a Kentucky trader and speculator, paid them 50 cents a day plus a $60 fee. According to popular legend, Lincoln saw his first slave auction while on this trip. Referring to the practice of slavery, he is said to have declared at the time, "If I ever get a chance to hit that thing, I'll hit it hard."

John Sheppard has encountered illegal pitching in many leagues and has been an advocate of its removal.

Edge: Abe. Civil Rights is hard to beat dude

4. Lincoln's in-laws disapproved of him. They hated his anti-slavery stance.

When John Shepard first came to Inwood I disapproved of him.
He drove me crazy at first, but through the years that opinion has changed. He is a friend

Edge: John Sheppard. Softball is more important than in laws.

3. Lincoln's debating skills first earned him national recognition.
John arguing, bitching, and sore loser desire to winner earned him recognition

Edge: Abe - I mean he did write The Gettysburg Address.
Also, Abe never got thrown out of a debate.

However, Sheppard has gotten tossed out of games on occasion.

2. Leadership
Both are great leaders and charismatic personalities.
Edge : John Sheppard b/c he can lead players while he is drunk

and the Number One Comparison between Abraham Lincoln and John Sheppard

1. Perseverance

The difference between history's boldest accomplishments and its most staggering failures is often, simply, the diligent will to Persevere.

The following failures could not stop Abraham Lincoln:

*1831 – Failed in business

1832 – Defeated for legislature1833

– Again failed in business 1834

– Elected to legislature 1835

– Sweetheart died 1836

– Had a nervous breakdown 1838

– Defeated for speaker 1840

– Defeated for elector 1843

– Defeated for Congress 1846

– Elected for Congress 1848

– Defeated for Congress 1855

– Defeated for Senate 1856

– Defeated for Vice-President 1858

– Defeated for Senate1860

but On November 6, 1860, Lincoln was elected as the 16th President of the United States,

He was defeated more times than he won, but that did not mean he was a failure.

Remember, that failures are only permanent if we stop trying.

he said "I believe the only real failure, is when you stop trying"

The only way to deal with failure is to learn from it and move on

OK John didn't become president like Abe, but he has dealt with many ups and downs in softball to win many championships and great memories.

Happy Birthday CHAMPIONSHIP MANAGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GHOST RIDER .. I uh mean a Ghost Writer speaks about AFRAUD

Not exactly

This isn't about a bad Nicholas Cage movie or comic book . It's about giving a relatively new sports blogger, Dio Jackson, AKA Ozzie Guillen, a chance to Ghost Write on Softballinsider.net

Dio feels very strongly about AFRAUD, I uh mean, the Alex Rodriguez steroid issue so checkout his blog at :
http://www.newyorkhighlander.blogspot.com/
As for me, I've always liked AROD and I am quite frankly sick of all this steroid witch hunting.

I know its an important issue, but at the same time I'm sick of everyone ratting on each other for profit.

No One likes a Rat.

I hope Arod comes clean, but he will likely go the Andy Pettitte route saying it was an isolated incident and try to spin it to his advantage.

Ricky Balboa

I've always been a sucker for Rocky Movies.
They started out academy award quality






















and got lost somewhere along Rocky V (avoid avoid avoid)














then ended strong with the Rocky Balboa flick







One of the best parts of all the Rocky movies is the training.

Without getting into the whole corny "Eye of the Tiger" thing one of my favorite lines is when Apollo Creed tells Rocky "There is No Tomorrow" when Rocky gets lazy and has no focus

http://www.fandome.com/video/105911/Rocky-III---Apollo-Creed-There-Is-No-Tomorrow/

Well I felt a little like that a few days ago.

Why?

I weighed myself. The scale said 228 lbs.
Damn.
I'm a fat motherfucker.
Anyway, no time to feel sorry for myself.

There is no tomorrow.

It's time to get into shape.

That means the dreaded 4 letter word.

DIET!!!!!!!!

I will be 40 this year.
The older you get the harder it is to lose weight.
My goal is 205. 23 pounds.
I know I can do it.

What my prediction for the battle of the bulge?

Like Mr. T's famous quote in Rocky III









'PAIN!!!!!!!!!"

Time to get to work









































Man, I hope my swings improves as my waist line does.

Anyway, it got me to thinking. A lot of softball players need to lose weight.

Top Ten Reasons you should lose weight for softball

10. Improve your Ability - this is so false.
Trimming down will not help you hit, throw, or catch.
Those are skills.
Forget softball do it for yourself
9. You'll look better and be asked to take more pictures with tourists in Central Park.
8. You pants will fit looser and you won't look like a bitch in them.
7. It's hot out there. Being a fat bastard in hot weather is brutal and dangerous.
6. Vanity. Everyone will tell you how great you look, as Billy Crystal would say "It's better to look good than play good"
5. People will think your faster. Your probably not but at least some people will think it.
4. Energy
3. Set a good example for the kids.























These are Blonde's kids. Do they really need to see Uncle Ricky as a tub of lard?

2. Develop Mental Discipline - The game of softball is like a diet, you must sacrifice and commit yourself to succeed ( psycho stuff I know)

and the Number One Reasons you should lose weight for softball

1. You'll be in shape to pick up your girl and celebrate a championship!!!!!
Yo Adrian!!!!!!!





































YO ASTRID!!!!!!!!!!!